Rapping with your Mac


It was only a matter of time before I got this far. I mean I got this Macbook pro thing and because I’m such a propeller head I gotta figure out how to do everything on OS X. The speech system really intrigues me. I have far too much fun with it. I’ve used it to leave threatening messages on a buddy’s voice mail. I’ve used it to scream at my children when they misbehave. I’ve even used it to swindle a kiss from my wife not thirty seconds ago. It’s way too addictive. Speaking of speaking on a Mac, why is it so hard to tap into the speech system from Java? Am I just looking in the wrong areas? I’ve been searching all day trying to find the recognition API docs and some quick and easy howtos on the com.apple.speech.recognition package and I’m getting nowhere. It’s like the best kept secret. There is an article or book on Oreilly.com describing it but you have to pay to read it. I just need a sample, “this is the jars you put in your classpath and these are the methods to call…” type of explanation. I think Apple doesn’t want that info to get into the wrong hands. I mean a brother could use it for selfish or evil means. I’ve already threatened to plug my co-workers power strip using apple speech. (It’s a long story, basically I stole back a power strip that I lent out. Then instead of just leaving a note, “hey I’m reclaiming the power strip I lent you” I took it to a whole ‘nother level and left a ransom message via voice mail demanding $1000 in unmarked bills in exchange for the returned equipment. This went on for a couple of days as I sent further demands using a separate voice for the kidnapper and a girl voice for the pleading power strip as it was being plugged.) If given enough time I could figure out how to imitate George Bush’s voice and request a large quantity of troops be engaged to round up able bodied developers and launch my eventual assault on the country in my quest for world domination. Maybe I wouldn’t be that savvy. However I could combine the synthesizer with the recognizer and implement some tricky almost artificial intelligence. I say almost artificial because it wouldn’t be nearly as artificial as the intelligence of the man who wrote it but I think it would be enough to fool the our current president into doing something wacky, like say… sending the troops in Iraq back home. I’m babling and making no sense what so ever! The point is this. Have you seen the Apple speech capabilities on OS X? You’re lying if you say yes because nobody actually sees the stuff. It’s more something to be heard or experienced. The first week of my playing with OS X I had a nice little conversation with my Macbook. I was all like, “tell me the time” and it was like, “It’s 6:32pm you jackass!” Then we got into some light conversation when I was like, “tell me a joke” and it got all clever with the knock-knocks. It’s late and I really have no reason to be writing other than my blog has been empty for a while and I’m having trouble finding docs on the speech stuff. It crazy because just when I started getting all dumb about my Macbook, using it to discipline my eight year old somebody on the other side of the net starts babbling about how great these things are. I guess I’m not the only one who sees the finesse in Apple technology. Its my bedtime, I’ll get up with yall on the next…

3 thoughts on “Rapping with your Mac

  1. HA!!! Now THAT’S funny!!! I can’t help it. When a piece of technology moves me like the Mac does I can’t help but give it my full attention. All jokes aside, I’m going to be getting back into G-Spec development sometime in the near future. Quiet as kept, I might also find some support on the project too!

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