His Royal Sandwich


For those that don’t know I’ve been in contact with a very experienced sandwich hunter for possible assignment on a task upon which I would be developing some highly valuable software. The software would be made available to users of a popular website and all royalties gleamed from the project would go to His Royal Sandwich. While it is not easy to develop the software something should be said of the level of difficulty in hunting a sandwich, especially one wielding a scepter. It’s not as straight forward as it seems. You don’t just open the fridge and, “bang! There’s the sandwich from yesterday’s lunch!” It’s way more involved than that. Sandwich hunting involves fast walking giraffes with turtles smashed around their feet, flying birds with concentric circles on their breasts, a disbanded troop of has-been deities, and a ringleader with nerves of steel and attire of women who can’t seem to get hiS pronouns correct. Yes, sandwich hunting is very involved… not for the faint of heart. It’s sort of like software development… err… well, you can draw your own personal analogy here.

Regarding the project, It’ll be off da’ chains if I get on board. You can imagine dynamic DSLs, stylesheets, automated deployment, BDD, M2 goals, mapping, mobile interfaces with GPS, and more… all within a 1.5M jar file. If I don’t do the project then it’ll most likely suck potatoes because it will lack all of the above. At any rate that’s what’s up with me. Wassup with y’all?

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